John 6:35 (NCV) Then Jesus said, “I am the bread that gives life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.”
I’ve come to this place again where I have given FEAR a foothold and allowed it to dictate my actions. So frustrated with myself this morning, I cried out to God “Lord what is WRONG with me? I don’t want to be this person… I so desire to be in your word and in fellowship with you. Why am I struggling?”
In the quietness I heard His still small voice “You’re not getting alone with me… You are not allowing me to sustain you through this valley.”
As much as I hate to admit it… I haven’t been having a good quiet time lately. I’ve been distracted by the circumstances in my life. My son, 12 years old, is growing up and is demanding his independence. He sure is good at being a 12 year old, strong-willed young man. To be honest…his demands are not often handled the right way and as a parent, my job is to guide and discipline – and sometimes I feel like a failure at it. I become the worst version of my self…and I blow up. Not good…not good at all! For me, change is so difficult…and I can’t control it one bit.
Ok, there you have it. This is another opportunity for me to trust God with everything… yet I worry. He wants us to CRY out to Him. Yet, when I worry or stress, I tend to shut down completely. I become too afraid to move. Reading through the gospel of John this morning, I was reminded of why I felt like this in the first place. It isn’t because I’m worried; It’s because I haven’t been handing my worry over to Jesus and trusting Him to provide.
Jesus is the only One who can sustain us and provide for every need we have. In times like this, I shouldn’t run and hide from the world around me. I should RUN to CHRIST and cling to him for every thirst, hunger and need. It shouldn’t matter that I am trying to get through to a strong-willed 12 year old who thinks he knows everything. I should be talking to Him about helping me through whatever “tantrum” comes next. He already knows my heart and my circumstance, it’s up to me to talk to Him about it….and lay it down at His feet.
He is the bread of life….and I can find nourishment and refreshment for my soul through Him. I don’t have to waste away in the middle of this valley, I can feast at the table of the Lord because He not will only satisfy my physical needs…but my spiritual needs as well.
God is greater than any problem I have. He will provide for every single need.